No Big Moment: Learning to Trust the Process
A blog post by Holly Worton (Associate Artist)
I have been asked to contribute to the Glass Performance blog with a post about my own learning and what has been significant in my own practice this year. Here goes…
I find I have been deeply challenged through working as an artist in HMP & YOI Polmont; a prison for young people in Scotland. I work with groups to create theatre using the methodology originally used by Junction 25 (A Beginner’s Guide to Devising Theatre, Jess Thorpe and Tashi Gore).
In this work – no day is the same. No moment is the same. It is an attempt at a real, creative collaboration between artists and young people in —with something to say, something to learn, and something to protest about.
Writing and talking about myself has always been uncomfortable for me. I find it hard to pinpoint the moments that feel pivotal in my artistic practice. I’m always searching for the important moment—the standout moment that makes me sure of who I am as an artist and of the work that I do. Maybe if I can identify one moment it’ll give me the confidence to know that I’m doing it ‘right’.
But this year, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not one big moment that changes everything; it’s the string of consistent learning, growing, and living that allows me to navigate my way through the landscape. Big arts wank? But it’s true. And so, as I can’t find just one moment, I’d like to share a few different ones that matter to me…
A list of moments:
Watching a group of young men change, challenge, and become curious about things that matter.
The small things.
Someone finding a voice through art.
Someone sharing a creative idea and watching it come to life.
Someone turning up, even though they haven’t had the best day.
The practice of eating together.
The question of the day.
The lows.
The hard days.
The days when the justice system is loud and right in your face—but also the breathing space that collaboration and creativity allow these incredible young people.
The click moment. This often happens differently for each individual, but that moment when “fuck it, I’ll give it a go” lands—and everything falls into place. When a young person knows their voice matters in the conversation.
The days when I’m not even sure I’m good at what I’m doing, but what I’m doing feels so important in my body.
In this work, you like to think you’re having an effect on these young people’s lives. But in reality, they are having an effect on you. They challenge you. They create theatre with you.
These moments have changed my life and changed my practice. And I realise I’m exactly where I need to be.